Simone

Worship No Man.

thread-like and bare I whisper...

If only I could be like you.
Be one of the guys. 
who could get things done.
Important things.
I Wouldn't have to tie my own shoe.

If only I could be like this.
Get people to sit.
Stand at attention.
Be larger than Life.
Life wouldn't be a hit or miss.

If only I could be great.
Have all the power.
Take full control.
Be the leader of the pack.
I wouldn't have to give and take.

And Yet - 

Wishing to be like you drains me too.
Consumes my energy.
The energy that I need to be alive.
It makes my world shrink.
So all I do is think - 
Is being like you about to mess up my mood?

I need 
to
stop and check this out.
Get back my tears, joy and pain that were my sacrifice to you.
I need
to 
stop  and check this out.
All my time that added to your years.
I need
to
stop and check this out.
I still have enough energy to focus on myself
my God!
Was it all a lie?
By making gods of men
did I comprise 
me.

Wait -
stop a while...
Let me remove the wool from my eyes.
So when I stare at the reflection 
I see me and not 
the magic trick 
of those counterfeit gods.
Those who rely on me and my energy to sustain their rule.
No more talk of idols
no need to be like any of you.

Let me get back to the me I was made to be.

Let me recollect self, soul and energy.

Ride It Out.

 Ride out your storm
God is there with you
You may not feel him
But you're not alone

It is so easy to stop and let the waves sweep you away when you’re overwhelmed by its size.

This is especially true if you’ve been there all along trying to put out the little fires that suddenly appear, that threaten to burn away all that you have been able to accomplish. So, when you think that you finally figured out how to put out the fire, along comes the water.

The trickle of water appears and you think to yourself, “oh well at least the place wont be so dry.” However, the water keeps coming. Then all of a sudden there are waves that fill your vision, until that is all you can see.

At this point you start thinking about the fact that you cannot swim and there are no life jackets near by. You look all around and see no one whose hand you can grab, to save you. Just when you decided to let the waves take you, wherever it wants to take you. But, something deep deep down, something forgotten, yells telling you to swim.

Then somewhere, some how along comes the ability to swim. Even though the water fills you to bursting you cannot stop swimming. You swim when you’re tired, when your breathing starts then stop. You swim even when you feel the sharks circling, ready to consume. You swim even though all feeling has left your body and you know for sure you will die. A strength you never knew you had prevents you from stopping, when your body has been shredded into a million pieces.

 You're hurting now
But your morning is coming
Just hold on to Jesus
And ride out your storm

Born To Fly…

It wasn't suppose to be like
 this.
I was created for so much
 more than to be bound to the land.
It wasn't suppose to feel like 
this.
To be pinned down by so 
much weight.
Breathless
Hopeless
helpless.
It wasn't suppose to look
 like this.
All Thunder and Lightening
Flashing lights.
I was never suppose to be 
constantly looking down for 
me.
I want to soar
be free.
To feel the wind caressing every single inch of 
me.
I want to be free.
I want to be still in midair
explode with power.
I want to be free.
I want to reach the heights of heights and never come down.
I want to be free.

I was born to fly
so high.
I was born of the air.
To glide this way and that
turn 
swirl
spread
my wings.
I was never meant to find peace in the dirt.
I was born to fly
I was born to be free.
   - Simone Grant (Jan 2020)

No Lie.

The truth is, we are all a little vulnerable, if we allow ourselves to be. We try to do the best we can even when we mess up. Trying should be enough.

When we feel sick both physically and mentally and someone ask how we are doing, sometimes the answer so simple as the question.

Often times when this happens we give the generic responses, take your pick:

I’m okay
I’m good
I’m fine, thank you
Everything is great.

However, sometimes it’s hard to get those words from the pit of our stomach. All we can manage is, I’m trying. For today and even for the rest of the week that will have to do. It will have to do because it is our truth. We do not complain about what’s happening to us and neither do we need sympathy. All we need is the acceptance that we are trying.

The truth is, the thought of not knowing what will happen to us terrifies us, even though that’s not how we should feel. It’s hard to face the truth of how vulnerable and small we feel from time to time. When nothing goes as planned but you decide to smile and trust the process. When you are even scared of a breakthrough because the reality of that breakthrough, may differ from the one you envisioned.

It’s hard to adjust to reality, when you operated on some premise of how you want the world to be. When you realize how close many people are to losing their humanity and you still have to be here, to witness it. It’s challenging when you know it’s going to be hard for others to understand you, because you don’t understand yourself.

It’s scary to know that your gifts may not be useful to anyone because in their reality it is of no use.

The truth is sometimes when we have tried all that we can and nothing works, all we can do is pray that God will do the rest.

Image result for Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen

Tapestry Of Life

Can you imagine being at a place where you can say: EVERY aspect of my life was necessary and perfect, where each painful step you took led to you imperfect perfect and it was good?

Maybe some of us are there, wish to get there or are getting there, but we all what to have that eureka moment.

Image result for “Now is the time to enliven, ennoble and enrich your life's tapestry.

When I was younger I was introduced to Mills and Boons novels and I loved them until I did not. I fell out of love with them, because they all had the same story line. The same predictable start, middle and ending.

So too with life.

People tend to hate the mundane, the predictable and either make up things in their heads or chase the thrills and ultimately spills of life. However, when it comes to obstacles, things that challenge our ordinary world, we cry foul and ask why me. We want things to always be smooth sailing, to go exactly like we want it to go. But it never does, does it?

We bemoan those dreadful experiences, but at the same time, get a thrill out of retelling them, over and over and over again. We want to only be around good people and do good, yet somehow we find ourselves with the wrong crowd often doing the wrong things. This, after just promising that the last mistake would be the last mistake while doing the current mistake that will soon be the last mistake. In essence we confuse ourselves.

Image result for Life is a tapestry woven by the decisions we make.

But you know what? It all matters. The terrible mistakes that you have and will continue to make. It all matters. When you look back at everything you have and are yet to experience, there will be plenty bittersweet moments that you will be glad you experienced.

Yes, life I think is like a tapestry.

I mean I have not seen many tapestry at all – if any in real life. But from what I can see we all have varied experiences. There are things that did not come together as we envisioned or planned, but they are a part of our story. Moments we wish we could relive because they were the exemption to the rules. Perfect – or so they seem-moments; remember people, perfect is relative.

Our tapestry though filled with imperfect stitches can be a masterpiece if we remember to let God direct the pattern that the final product will take. No one said that the pieces have to match, they just need be the layers that you become as the tapestry is woven by your actions.

We all need to remember this:

Every single thread of our lives is vital to our tapestry and arranged by the wisdom and power of God.

What is Life?

What is life?

 But the essence of something wonderful that ends too soon. 
A moment
 in a thousand other little moments wrapped in comfort food.
The whisper of a promise, 
half fulfilled.
The knowing of not knowing but knowing there is a mystery to uncover.
The thrill of discovery.
The agony of loss.
To be born and know life is to find the rainbow.
To live it is to know the rainbow has no end or beginning.
 It just is.

To count:
1
2 
3...
Like counting gains of sand.
It's a happiness that shifts this way and then that way
never to be contained.
Never for sale.
It's the joy of knowing that every fiber of your being 
has power shooting from each limb.

To know death but not fear it.
To be small, yet stand tall.

What is life if not a dream?
When bad days become good days and 
you hold both in the palm of your hand.

Lovepainjoygriefsmilelaughrunwalktalkeatsucceedfailnoregretsjustbe
Just
breath...
1
2
3...

What is life?
Too many answers.
Too little time.

What is life?

Make it matter.

      - Simone Grant

Brown, Gray, and Black Butterfly Perching on Human Finger

Motivation

“When there is no enemy within, the enemy outside can do you no harm.”
African Proverb

Is it then true that the only locked doors we have are the ones we construct in our minds? Is it as simple as this?

It’s hard to know what’s true, but what is true about each of us is that our minds are the most powerful and valuable possession we have. It is also true that if we do not use our minds for good, it will turn on us. It will produce what we plant there and can either build or destroy our dreams.

Image result for May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.

It’s hard to know what to do when you’re the only one complaining. When you’re the only one who see something more, just out of reach, if only so many eyes were not looking at you, judging, waiting to tell you, “you see, it was all a bad dream, it will never be”. It is hard to keep going when you do not trust the process and your doubt s block your vision. It makes you sick to your stomach, when you look away from the Light that has kept you for so long, and look instead into a bottomless pit. You may smile, but we know that behind that smile is a helpless quivering mass of human frailty and fragility.

Do not quit they say, even when you are staring death in the face. If you do then you will surely die. Do not give up. even if physically, your body betrays you, because if your mind does that too – let’s not imagine that!

Let us not imagine, with a damaged vision, where we do not want to be. Instead let us focus on where we want to be so we can get there. Focus on what you can be and not what you are, especially in the eyes of others. Outside of God, your future depends on you and no one else. Anyone can give you advice but no one knows you better than you can know yourself. Be good being you, and do what you are being led to do by the Holy Spirit, even if no one can understand, that’s okay.

It is good to be an outsider, because you will always add something interesting to a predictable mix. Decide to follow the path that is for you and confidently go forward. With any storm you face, God will bring all that is good.

Also, here’s a secret you may not know or have forgotten:

In the midst of life we do not die but become transformed by the renewing of our minds.

	Simone on Freedom from maladaptive …
	Farrah on Freedom from maladaptive …
	Simone on Maladaptive Daydreaming
	Priscilla on Maladaptive Daydreaming
	Simone on Maladaptive Daydreaming