You and Me. Me and You.

I had a conversation with myself just the other day…

“Is it worth it? Is it really worth it to be here with everyone else? Imagine living on your own Island, what peace! There would be no one to compare yourself to. You could do what you wanted to do, and there would be no disapproving parents, friend, family to make you feel bad about your choices. Imagine, there would be no need for you to every do anything you don’t want to do! wouldn’t that be heavenly?”

“But what would you do?” “Wouldn’t it be lonely?”

“Nope and no”. Why would I be lonely? I know there would be no suffering, no one to miss, death would not invade my world. All the garbage and filth in this world would not be a part of my island. If at first I missed anyone it would leave me, we tend to forget after awhile and any pain at leaving then behind would fade. But oh! What peace I would find on my island. Far, far away from it all!”

“I don’t think you would be happy, being all alone I think you would get bored on that island. Think about it, have you every lived on your own?”

“Well, I hate living in this world but I don’t want to die, so the best solution is to go somewhere where I will be happy”.

“You don’t want to die, why? Would you miss anything here, could that be why?”

” I wish I could take, all the beauty here, all the things I love and take somewhere else. I have suffered so much here and I know more is to come, maybe it’s better if I could run”.

“You don’t know what troubles may be on your island. earth did not begin the way it is today”

” But why do I have to face the uncertainties of a world that can bring such sadness, such loss, pain and permanency?”

“But here you are not alone. Here there are persons who love you. Persons who want you to find peace. Here is the opportunity to rely on and learn from those around you. Right here where you are is the help that you need, if only you would look, if only you would see.”

And so I thought about that conversation, these questions kept repeating. Could it be true? Was there a possibility to find peace here and not only on my island, to be content with the closeness of others? Could peace really exist with me and you and you and me?

The Heart is Deceitful…

Just when you think you are getting out of that dark place, cold callous and wicked tentacles threaten to drag you back into the abyss. When we isolate ourselves from the things that make the heart heavy and the spirit low are we not able to operate from a better place?

We all want to have only the good things and not the bad but are we okay with getting it by any means necessary? Should we feel justified at someone’s suffering because they or someone they know have done bad things?

if we really stop and think about how we think, we will realise that we are far from being the “good” person we want to be. We realise that we may still take pleasure in seeing justice being served or someone, “getting what’s coming to them because it is justified”. However, if we are truly honest, we will admit that we all have done questionable and outright bad things at some degree or another. If we really search our heart we will find things about ourselves hidden in the shadows that we would not like to come to light. The person we are thrilled to see defeated, may have been crying out for help but we never took the time to help but skipped straight to condemning.

The heart is deceitful, because if we allow it to rule us, we may end up doing that which is not of the Spirit but that which is of the flesh. We may become distracted by superficial matters that do not address real problems. We can allow ourselves to be influenced by forces that work for evil and not for good. We may find ourselves championing causes that have nothing to do with doing what is right and everything that is wrong.

“The heart is deceitful and desperately wicked” (Jeremiah 17: 9)

There is no one here on this earth that has not struggled with this. While there are those who are winning the battle there are many more who have lost, and who take pleasure in the losing of their soul to wickedness. We have to be constantly on guard for the moments when our weaknesses threaten to overtake the logics of our spirit. It is a spirit that gives us this sense that we are still under construction, even while there are things around us that say otherwise. The Spirit that reminds us that we are not perfect nor are we expected to be perfect. A Spirit that reminds us that we should not think of ourselves as the saviour of anyone, because all we can do, is the best that we can do as imperfect beings.

For there is truth in the fact that in our weakness we see the unrelenting power of the Almighty. It is a power that speaks to the deceitful heart and brings peace to a tormented spirit.

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord,
And whose hope is the Lord.

8 For he shall be like a tree planted by the waters,
Which spreads out its roots by the river,
And will not fear when heat comes;
But its leaf will be green,
And will not be anxious in the year of drought,
Nor will cease from yielding fruit. (Jeremiah 17:7-8)