Category: Encountering New Experiences

Lessons From My Garden.

A Garden brings a sense of purpose to many, it means a little exercise for some and to me I realise we the right mindset, there is so much we can learn…

Now let’s start from the top. The lesson I learned from the first photo is to see the beauty in everything. This dilapidated plant stand was once beautiful and strong. It was once relied on to hold all those plants that surround it. Now, it has lost its original purpose but it adds a rustic beauty to the scene. Also those plants now help its beauty to shine even brighter.

Next, is my peace spot. plants of different lengths and strength intertwined to offer a shield of peace in a place that offers little shelter from the real world. It teaches me that when you find that peaceful spot you must take the time to appreciate it. It also reminds me of the importance of having that oasis in a seemingly barren land, one that gives joy peace and happiness.

After this, there is the star fruit tree. Though small and young it has provided six crops already! It reminds me that age was never a limitation. The limitation comes from the impositions placed on age by society. The tree cares little for expectations and bears when it is ready. It doesn’t care for anyone’s timeline, except its own and because of this we can appreciate both its generosity and beauty in both bloom and bearing.

These two stalk of scallion were planted by untrained hands. There was little expectation and yet they decided to live. It reminds me that it is not whether others belief in you but if you believe in yourself. If you believe in yourself enough for everyone else there is nothing you can’t do or be. Your strength comes from within and is dependent on your will given to you by the Almighty. Though few will be there who really believe in you, believe in yourself and forget about the rest. You will get there in time.

Then there is this yam tree that thrives in a once barren space. It was the site of a traumatic event. A coconut tree struck by lightning, never to recover. Before it was planted by my aunt noone thought it could ever be redeemed, no one deemed it useful. Now this once barren hole brings forth life once, life that will feed nourish and make whole.

surrounded by a bean tree is the ruins of a limes tree. It was once tall, full and fluffy and bore limes until all its branches bowed to the ground. The limes on that tree was almost the size of a good sized lemon! Many persons benefited from that lime tree and we thought it would never stop giving. Then last year it became one of the many victims of the drought season. Of course we were in denial of its dying because it had been so strong and generous. Weaker trees had survived, why could it not? However, it still died even though we tried to save it, it was its time. However it still stands because it was needed. It was needed to offer support to things still alive. Death is always in the middle of the living and vice versa and sometimes the dead become the shoulder that the living stands on to realise its potential.

The final picture is that of a beautiful flower that fell down, we thought it was dead. Though it fell it did not die. It found a way to thrive where it had fallen and to not only add even more beauty, but more importantly hope. I gathered hope that if I fall I can still shine. If I fall where I did not begin or hope to be, I can still thrive and flourish. It is not where you end up but what you do while you are there.

There are many lessons we can learn from so many unassuming things, if we only take the time to really look closely.

I Don’t Want to Exist, I Want to Live!

If you died today what would your legacy be? I have thought about this and for me it is still up in the air. I guess it’s not up to me to answer that question; time will tell and so will my eulogy. I realise that sometimes the view we have ourselves differ greatly from the view others have of us. Some feel the need to write their own eulogy, just to be sure. I have been teaching for thirteen years and I often wonder if I have done enough with all the wonderful talents I have been blessed. Have I done enough? Been enough, seen enough, lived enpugh!? Can these questions ever be satisfactorily answered?

There was a time that I was so passionate about what I did and I did my best to do what I did. However, as time goes by and the expectations of critics are not met, they begin to chip away at the budding confidence you had in your ability. They look and note that you have not ascended to the lofty heights they thought you would reach and they tell you; so, you begin to question whether or not you really did anything, whether what you did was enough. It becomes especially hard when you see others who have done so many things that they have been recognised for and you begin to lose confidence in the little things you once thought were so great. May, you now feel, you are placed in a waiting room, because you disobeyed your call to action from God, then you begin to wonder if you are just drifting away.

But all I want to do is just live. I just want to live the kind of life I was intended to live, without fear worry or tears to cloud my vision. That is it, that is all. I don’t want the fame and I don’t want the fortune and don’t need the empty promises of who I could have been. In this moment without any more regrets and doubts about my place here at this time in history, I just want to live. This desire comes from a place that has never had time to heal properly from past wounds, it is too raw to touch, yet it yearns for sunlight. Above everything that this world could offer, all I desire is a chance to truly live a life free of expectations and perceptions, stereotypes and stereotypes. I want to inhale deeply and exhale freely and feel my heart swell with the joy of knowing that I have this gift that is worth more than silver and gold. We all need to just live and be allowed to live and any attempt to derail this is a crime against our humanity

There are so many landmines that people have to go through in this world, and many do not make it. There are unique problems that we each face that threaten our ability to live, some more than others. It is easy to become disenchanted by all the rocky mountains with loose rocks that come at our heads before we thinking about climbing those mountains. At the heart of everything is the one unchangeable truth, nothing is more precious than life. Nothing requires our full attention, but the desire to live.

Before we think of death, we have to deal with the business of how we will keep on living. We have to be aware of the value not only of our right to live but the right of all persons to live the life they have been given by God. It is a right that many are denied , a right that many do not know they have, right that should never be hijacked or denied. We should also keep in mind that we do not only fight to live, we also fight to realise the joy of truly be alive!

Think Tank

Someone’s journey begins with this verse. How does this apply to you? It is a beautiful door isn’t it? Many of us have such beautiful doors that we not only lock, but we also batten down tight. It takes many errors sometimes to realise that all we have to do is surrender when we are in doubt and wait for what’s to come. We need to breathe, let some cool breeze in that will give life and light. When we close ourselves off from all possibility, why do we expect to get a miracle. We have to open ourselves, though we may be afraid, though we may be cynical to the possibilities of miracles and a gentle voice that guides, instead of confuses.

Watching... waiting for His coming

Someone needs the reassurance of these words as they face the hail storm that lie ahead after coming through the fire that is now behind them. There is always a period when there is perfect peace and in those times we have to grab a hold of sanity and let it lead the way. Sometimes we stand alone ot among a few and realise that pain will lead to pleasure and sadness will give way to joy. To mould you He had to break you ans to smooth you out you had to burn. A promise is a promise and will come true if you believe.

Revelation 3:10 (ESV) - Revelation 3:10 ESV - Because you have ...

A season is only for a moment, a moment that may seem too long for you to bear. So just when you feel that this is it, then comes the shower of rain. All you need to do is to wait for it and let it happen. There is no potion you can brew that can get you where you want to be or need to be. Healing comes after the wound and not before. There is a process that must take place before you can come out on the other side.

god restores health

But you will and when you do, all you can say is Thank you Lord, I made it through.

Emotions.

Being emotional is often associated with being weak mentally and impulsive in many instances. However, emotions are necessary in order to be intuned with reality. Or, at least that is what I belief.

Is it really as simple as changing your thoughts in order to change your feelings and emotion? There are some people who are identified as being highly emotional, which on sight implies that they act oftens based on how they feel and may not cope well with reality. However, as someone who would like to lump myself in the category of highly emotional people, I think we tend to see the truth way ahead of most and therefore are more in tuned with reality.

I can often tell when someone has a negative reaction to me even if they appear to be so kind and so nice to me and ten times out of ten I am proven right. It does help that they cannot keep up the charade for long and long before the big reveal, there a evident cracks in the nice guy facade. It seems that we can tell when someone is not as emotionally connected, lacks compassion and seems detached from everything happening around them.

It is true that people who are highly emotional do get tired and anxious in extremely tense situations, especially when the situation is allowed to continue indefinitely. However, we welcome and need change and when it does not happen we get anxious, we want to break down the barriers that refuse us from experiencing it.

The trick is to understand why we feel the way we feel in a certain situation and be patient with others and ourselves. We experience emotions whether we like it i not, whether we care to admit it or not, but we can take the time to find a means by which we can channel these emotions to our good. It really is important that we embrace and are honest about how we feel moment by moment. I have learned the hard way how dangerous and anti-productive it can be to ignore how you feel and in instances try to suppress them. I have felt the sharp teeth of regret because I have reacted in the wrong way at the wrong time because of years of suppressed emotion. While there are persons who may feel uncomfort at your display, it is better that they experience honest emotion instead of those tainted by time that had not healed all wounds.

I am slowly learning how to be honest about how and why I feel the way I do and I see that there is no better cure for a peace of mind than this.

The Heart is Deceitful…

Just when you think you are getting out of that dark place, cold callous and wicked tentacles threaten to drag you back into the abyss. When we isolate ourselves from the things that make the heart heavy and the spirit low are we not able to operate from a better place?

We all want to have only the good things and not the bad but are we okay with getting it by any means necessary? Should we feel justified at someone’s suffering because they or someone they know have done bad things?

if we really stop and think about how we think, we will realise that we are far from being the “good” person we want to be. We realise that we may still take pleasure in seeing justice being served or someone, “getting what’s coming to them because it is justified”. However, if we are truly honest, we will admit that we all have done questionable and outright bad things at some degree or another. If we really search our heart we will find things about ourselves hidden in the shadows that we would not like to come to light. The person we are thrilled to see defeated, may have been crying out for help but we never took the time to help but skipped straight to condemning.

The heart is deceitful, because if we allow it to rule us, we may end up doing that which is not of the Spirit but that which is of the flesh. We may become distracted by superficial matters that do not address real problems. We can allow ourselves to be influenced by forces that work for evil and not for good. We may find ourselves championing causes that have nothing to do with doing what is right and everything that is wrong.

“The heart is deceitful and desperately wicked” (Jeremiah 17: 9)

There is no one here on this earth that has not struggled with this. While there are those who are winning the battle there are many more who have lost, and who take pleasure in the losing of their soul to wickedness. We have to be constantly on guard for the moments when our weaknesses threaten to overtake the logics of our spirit. It is a spirit that gives us this sense that we are still under construction, even while there are things around us that say otherwise. The Spirit that reminds us that we are not perfect nor are we expected to be perfect. A Spirit that reminds us that we should not think of ourselves as the saviour of anyone, because all we can do, is the best that we can do as imperfect beings.

For there is truth in the fact that in our weakness we see the unrelenting power of the Almighty. It is a power that speaks to the deceitful heart and brings peace to a tormented spirit.

7 “Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord,
And whose hope is the Lord.
8 For he shall be like a tree planted by the waters,
Which spreads out its roots by the river,
And will not fear when heat comes;
But its leaf will be green,
And will not be anxious in the year of drought,
Nor will cease from yielding fruit. (Jeremiah 17:7-8)

To Be Influenced or Not.

It seems quite common for people to act as a collective when it suits their agenda and be divided when it does not. One of the global cultural phenomenon that had emerged over the years is the influencer culture. When I was younger there were international personalities that I liked and listened to but never really thought about unless I was consuming some aspect of their productivity. So I had my favourite singers, movie stars ect. However, outside of those roles I did not know nor did I care to get to know them more. I was fine just enjoying their talent for a limited time and living MY life for the duration of my existence.

Today I notice that there are many persons who are obsessed with those personalities they admire, which for me is a bit strange and also disturbing. The idea of an influencer has moved beyond the ubiquitous definition of someone who has the power to affect the buying power of consumers to, for many, someone who they see as their friend. Really an influencer is like a salesperson, there to sell you something not to be your friend. whether that thing is an actual product or a dream at the end of the day that is it.

Yet many choose to ignore this one unchangeable truth, and instead become so invested in the lives of these persons to the point where they ignore their own lives to preside over those they deem as being “like family”.

Sure there may be qualities in a person that you admire and they may motivate you in some way but the key here is that no matter what you do, you can never replicate them or their lives. The danger comes when persons ignore their reality to construct a possibility on someone else’s sand heap. The tide will always come in and tear it down. Many people rely on the voices of others to direct them and never the voice of the Almighty. They look at what others have achieved and think they can do it too, while being ill-equipped to do so.

On the other hand, one may say that positive influence should be separated from negative. While this is true, often times we do not realise that even when we aim to do what is “good” it is because we are influenced and not because it is a conviction that we have. What this suggests is that we want to please, or we want others to like us, so, we censor what we say and do to match the narrative we want others to have about us. When someone is influenced to do something “good” or “right” does it make being influenced a good or bad thing? Wherever we stand, we must be honest enough to acknowledge that being influenced is a way of life that has led to many unhappy persons, who seem stuck in slow motion, as they grapple with where their opinions begin versus those who have influenced them.

The Only Way is Up!

I am sure that at some point you may have felt the burden of your past. You are so burdened that your legs cannot carry the weight of that past and so you buckle under the pressure of it.

You may also feel the weight of real or imagined eyes that accuse and arrest you and say to you that you dare not move on. While it is important to learn the lessons that need learning from your past, one should never dwell there. One should never pitch a tent there or build a bed there, because they feel like giving up.

“Sir, I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, and while I am going another steps down before me.” (John 5:7)

There are many things that will try to hold us back. There was that great opportunity that we missed and can never get back. Or, there is this one person, or thing that will not leave us alone long enough for us to take the step we need to make the move that is required to step into the pool of opportunity waiting for us. There are so many things that have held us back, and we can’t seem to shake them. Maybe it is that we do not have to tools to overcome these obstacles by ourselves and we are still searching, hoping and praying from the right thing that will help us to do so.

“Get up, take up your bed, and walk.” (John 5:8)

The trick is to stop being your own worst enemy. So,before you get too far, from heeding the naysayers who punish you for the wrongs you may have done and the wrongs of everyone else they could not hold accountable, think whether this is the life you are meant to life. In life you can’t continuously keep looking down or you may miss the path you’re suppose to take and bypass the stops you are suppose to make. When we are given the chance to try again, we cannot stay in the same spot and hope for something or someone to tip us into the pool. Like the man at the poolside who had tried to get in for thirty-eight year, you have to get up, take that bed and walk. Now, life will not be smooth sailing and the experience and some of the baggage accumulated over the years will not magically disappear. But you cannot stay along the pool side if you have been given the opportunity to be healed. You cannot harbour years of doubt, fear or recrimination and hope to move forward. All those things that have kept you immobile have to be removed for you to move up.

and he took up his bed and walked (John 5:9)

At some point we have to decide if the fear of failing is stronger than our need to rise, to experience something truly wonderful and real. When we have been stuck for a long time, will we find the strength, given by The Almighty to finally walk into a future that we are meant to experience? Only you can answer that question and heed the command to get up and walk.