Category: Encountering New Experiences

You Have No Excuse!

On my way to work this morning I had no idea what this post would be about, I had so many thoughts swirling around in my head. “I’ll figure it out when I get to work”.

Life is full of interesting surprises.

I took the taxi and at in the back, already there was a small boy with a bag. Not just any bag, but what we in Jamaica refer to as a crocus bag. I sat, got comfortable and the taxi drove off – We were on our way. I suddenly saw the boy open the top of the bag and ask, “yuh a’right”. This definitely had my attention. At the same time another passenger was picked up and the boy tried to shift the bag away from the side of that passenger. The taxi man then asked the little boy what was in the bag, he promptly responded that it was a cock fowl and he defended his action, when challenged, by letting the taxi man know he had to protect his money! A cock, no big deal maybe it’s a school project. Don’t ask what kind of school project, I was just as baffled as you.

Long story short. This little boy was taking the cock to school and after school, he would be taking said cock to a cock figh! Now at this point everyone in the taxi were like, “what in the world of tarnation is this?” According to him the cock had never lost a fight and so he, having made quite a bit of money on him already, was taking him to a cock fight after school!

After some questioning we learned that he had come prepared for the day with food and other things that would ensure the comfort of his champion fighter.He spoke with confidence of his cock’s abilities and wining ways and I was left to marvel at the ingenuity and initiative of this child that looked no older than 11!

Granted I got a little squeamish at the thought of a cock fight, and felt a little sorry for him; but hey that’s not the point here.

It was clear that this little fellow had a passion and knew how to pursue it. As children there were things we wanted to do and pursue as adults and it just hasn’t materialized yet. What we need to do it seems is to tap into our passions and pursue them relentlessly.This little fellow spoke with such confidence and fearlessness about his plans and I knew he would not b easily dissuaded from his mission of attending and having his investment participate in that match today after school!

If you have lost your passion, now is the time to rediscover it. You have no excuse not to.

Get a Grip! Don’t Slip!


The tragedy of life is in what dies inside a man while he lives – the death of genuine feeling, the death of inspired response, the awareness that makes it possible to feel the pain or the glory of other men in yourself.
Read more at:

Norman Cousins

Just a reminder for everyone today, who are trying to avoid ending up back in a dark place. It does matter who your are, where you are from or how successful you are. We can’t ignore that at times, even in the middle of winning we can find ourselves spiraling out of control. Make sure to check with yourself and reset if things have gotten out of your control.

We have opportunities to grow in many ways but just make sure you don’t grow away from something genuine. Instead, especially when we are blessed with plenty, we should be aware that we remain grounded in our thoughts actions and reaction to others.

It’s easy to forget about how you may have struggled to be where you are but don’t do that! Remember the person behind who is about to slip and give them a hand up. It’s easy to celebrate when you are in the spotlight. But don’t forget the persons waiting in the wings, sitting in the audience cheering you the loudest; remember their time is coming too! Celebrate with them when it does and you are in the wings or sitting among the crowd.

It’s easy to get distracted by you, you and you; where it becomes me, myself and I. But in doing so you shut yourself out of truly being a part of something greater than yourself.

If you find yourself slipping, catch yourself before you fall!

Are You Behind schedule?

Good! When you are behind schedule no one will see you coming and when they do, you can say [LOOK AT ME NOW!!!] Your light will shine bright enough to pave the way for others

It’s okay. We all wont get going at the same time. There are many who feel they have been left behind. We are the late bloomers! We need to tell ourselves, it’s okay not to be in line with the achievements of your peers and close friends.

Being a late bloomer may make persons feel bitter and harbor a lot of resentment because of the limiting position they think they are in. While your friend is a brain surgeon at 13 or could drive at 6, you are there trying to figure out how not to injure yourself from your own cluelessness!

Yep you’ve got it; success is sweetest when achieved early. Or so society makes it seem.While everyone is busy collecting those points, you wonder,”what’s the rush?’ Of course this is because you a absolutely clueless!

Maybe you don’t need to be “on schedule”.

But who decides if you are truly behind? If you are looking at what everyone has achieved or have accumulated then you are looking at the wrong clock!There is no time limit on when you can discover what makes you happy and what your passion is in life. It is also true that you don’t have to remain in something you are not happy with because it’s too late.

It’s never late.

If there is something that you have always wanted to do but felt intimidated by the sheer enormity of the task ahead, don’t be.I realize that being late to the party can be a humbling experience. There will be more appreciation for what you have accomplished because of the time it took to accomplish it in. You learn to realize that the world does not need to revolve around you but that you should make meaningful contributions that benefit those around you.

When it rains it pours!

When you do start blooming your beauty will be there to inspire others.So when you time comes make sure to make the most of it and spread your petals as far as you like!

You Tried It!


When you attempt to flatter yourself or make others look foolish but it didn’t work out well for you.

My personal favorite:


when someone tries to check you but it fails!

For persons who try it we just give them a [toast]!!!

There comes a time in life when you have to say enough is enough. I wanted to include some exclamation marks here but As I grow older I try to remain calm – until sufficiently provoked of course. But if it was when I was younger then who knows. Anyways! You have to say enough when you are placed in a position where you have to respectfully correct others about their view of you. When you have to make it clear that they do not have control over your image or your destiny.

It’s great to be nice and be a unifying force and stand for world peace. But when your world is being compromised by the malicious intentions of a few, you need to stand your ground. Among us are some people who think too much of their influence on you and we need to educate them. We need to sit them gently down – or not – and remind them of our own power and stubborn will to thrive in any place; whether an oasis or in the desert.

Just had to put this here!!!

In response to those people my grandmother would say, “not today satan, you tried it but not to-day!

It’s always good to take stock of the moments when you feel you are about to be defeated in your push forward. We cannot give in to those persons or feelings, because we have a plan that needs to come to fruition.

It’s hard sometimes to pick yourself up after others try to tear you down or, when out of the blue you’re hit from behind.

Never stop, never give up, even when your nemesis is waiting in the wings to devour you and your dreams. Stand and defend yourself and your peace of mind and watch everything fall in place!

The Right Reason


Are you doing things for the right reason? I was speaking to a colleague today and the conversation led me to ask myself this question. Sometimes it is really hard to be honest with ourselves. We can give it but we can’t take it!

When you do something, are you doing it for the right reason? When you say something, are you saying it for the right reason? If you could weigh everything you say and do, would you be doing them for the right reasons? Would you be coming from a place that is real?

Many of us do and say things that we do not believe; we reside in places that we are uncomfortable in. However, we do them,say them and live there because we feel it is what is expected, what is required to be accepted by the group you want to be a part of.

It’s hard to know if we really are doing what we are capable of doing or just bluffing our way through life. There are too many of us who are happy with letting the wind blow where it may in our lives and then cry and complain because things are not going our way.

Yes as human beings we can be very contrary at times.We want to do and be but we never really do anything to get there.

Be honest with yourself.

So we come back to the questions. When we getup each day and live out that day, are we satisfied with what we have done and where we are at? Do we do things because we want to? If not, then we are not being real to ourselves or the people around us.If we take that promotion because we want to be validated but we are not really about that life, then it’s not for us. Do not base your decision on gaining recognition and fame only but because it is what really matters.

If you are afraid but confident (even if others discourage you) and you have a gut feeling, go with it, it’s usually right. Sometimes we know that what we are doing is wrong and where we are is not where we should be, but we do not pay attention to those feelings because we are afraid what others will think of our decision.

Don’t Doubt Yourself!

You know what is right for you; no one else can. You know what it will take to make you happy and content. chasing after what everyone else is chasing will not do it. Getting advise is good , especially from people who are successful in the area you want advise in. However, after getting it you then need to decide how you will use it. Remember everyone is different and you cannot expect to get the same result as someone else. Be willing to embrace your intuition and do what feels right for you and no one else, not even for someone who is the closest to you. Do not live on anyone else’s terms but your own; because, no one can live your life for you. When you feel confused or you are unsure of how to move forward ask yourself if you are making a decision for the right reason.

Are you being real to yourself?

Remember to be honest with yourself all the time.

The Danger of Looking Back and Staying There.


“Don’t look back, girl,” … “You’re not going that way!” 


Celia Mcmahon, Skye: Part 1

“Ten years ago, I had so much going for me and now I have nothing; there is nothing that I currently enjoy doing, not work, going out, nothing. I wish I could go back ten years ago”.

I am pretty sure that EVERYONE can relate to having said something similar at least once in their lives. at some point we have felt a deep desire to return to a past experience or lifestyle, that makes our current situation seem like hell.

However, when we spend too much time looking behind us, precious time is lost for us to live in the present. While others are making plans for the future or learning from past mistakes, you are there busy looking at ruins too late to reconstruct or experiences no longer relevant to the present.

I am not suggesting that it may not be important to look back at a past mistake and learn from it but there is a danger when you are stuck in the past glories of your life. When you can hardly ever say, “I am going to…” but mostly “I was…” or “I did….” When the glory days become all you have to look forward to, then there is no room for creating or experiencing something new, and looking back becomes dangerous.

Can we look back?

One of the most important times to look back is when we need to see how far we have come and how much we have accomplished.Sometimes we do not realize that we are not exactly where we started. it may be hard to properly determine our progress, when we expect so much of ourselves and from life in general. When our minds start playing tricks on us, and we cannot see that we are advancing, because it seems to be taking forever! We need to look back in order to motivate ourselves that we will eventually reach the finish line and cross it. This act of looking back is necessary for our evolution as a person.

We can also learn from past mistakes and not repeat them. This too can be so difficult. We realize that we do not want to make the same mistakes but sometimes we do! The challenge is to look back at the point at which we went wrong and change our reaction or action. The point here is that it can be very necessary to look back at what we have done so that we don’t end up going in circles.


“The only reason time seems to be moving rather fast is that sometimes we’re too busy living in the past.”


― Dominic Riccitello

Living in the Past

“I recently bought a pair of shoes that did not fit properly! I tried it and knew it would not be comfortable but still I took it! Based on the exclamation marks you must realize my frustration at this point.I took the shoes because the size was the size I had always been; so it was the size on the shoe versus how it fit.”

When we live in the past we can never find the right fit in the now.

Depending on who you are there can be a sense of comfort and familiarity in living in the past. You don’t have any nasty surprises because you know what to expect. Your life can become a re-run of your favorite show and no one would be harmed by your doing so. However, there is a big loser and it is you. When you choose to live in the past, you also cannot stand in your present or step forward into your future. Sometimes we get so caught up in thinking how better yesterday was, that we cannot change today in order to have a tomorrow. We fail to appreciate the experiences we have in the now, until we look back at them and wish we had stayed there and be present, just a little longer. We may realize too late that once the present is gone it is gone and thinking about yesterday will not make our today any better. By living in the past we can become trapped there while life and everyone in it passes us by.

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So look back if you must, but don’t get stuck there!

If we want to have healthy relationships today, then we have to be present ; we need to place our loved ones at the forefront of our thoughts and not have them as an afterthought- a backdrop easily replaced or forgotten. We need to step out of the past and leave it where it is, so we can stand firmly in our now.

Is Validation Wrong?


What the superior man seeks is in himself; what the small man seeks is in others.


― Confucius

What does validation mean to you? We begin to address the first question by asking another question. I am a genius right? but hear me out. To validate someone or something can mean to prove or confirm that they are valuable or worthwhile.In other words we have a sense of worth by getting praise or recognition.

Validation on its own can be a wonderful experience, a necessary act. In validating someone we are acknowledging their unique qualities. We are saying, “yes I see you and I know that you are special and I respect you”. We all seek validation in all areas of our lives, whether or not we want to admit this.It’s difficult to measure if this is always good or bad. Certainly, there is a sense of pride when our efforts are recognized and we are able to see how pleased others are with our work. I suppose that is why there are so many award shows and ceremony nowadays. Everyone wants to get a gold medal, a statue, plague or even a certificate, that piece of paper that validate their efforts. No one wants to encounter the dreaded realm of non-recognition.

If you are waiting on someone, don’t!


Don’t worry about getting credit, do the work anyway.” 


― Richie Norton

Don’t wait on someone to validate you and your abilities. Validation becomes something bad when we base our worth and purpose in this life on what others say or think about us.When all that we are is the title we have been assigned by someone else and not the work we have yet to do. When we plan our lives based on what others will say and do.In order to be truly happy you need to do what feels right to you and what is right for you. When you need to stop, think and change your outlook, is when you cannot act without seeking or receiving validation from others.

Where does validation begin?..

Validation begins with self-validation. You must recognize your own good qualities and belief in them before others can. You must first praise yourself for your accomplishment and not wait on others to do so for you.When you do this then it won’t be whiplash when others do so.In validating yourself you recognize your worth and accept it. You also don’t need a medal, an award or a certificate to know your worth.The praise you receive from others should not be able to make or break your world but the “icing on the cake”!

The cake was already delicious without the icing! Make sure to enjoy its own unique flavor before you get to the topping.

In order to feel supported loved and valued we first need to give that to ourselves.But also we should remember that validation is not a one way thing. While we seek to validate ourselves and while we value the validation of others, let us remember to validate others. To focus on receiving praise and never consider giving is when we enter the domain of selfishness. Remember, validation is a good thing, just consider the reason you are seeking it.