Memories are like daggers and boulders
the cut deep anhd crush mercilessly.
I wish I could tell my youngerself
it's okay to be you
to not shrink to fit a mould
too small
limiting and not true.
Memories leave wounds that struggle to heal
festering with each new failure
until Little becomes a bid deal.
Them memories
choke the life out of your reality
because they mock the you
you buse to be
could have been should have been
may never be...
Memories are like daggers and boulders
At once their is deep joy and deathly pain
when you realise
you can never live that life again
burning lava snake down your face
and leave a trail of regret
that overwhelms and defeats
I have to hold tight
today I gain relieve by looking ahead
My tommorow may yet spring a mustard seed
Tag: freedom
My Own Story
I tired to draw my own story
Today
I sat with my pen and paper
Today
I drew myself first
Today
So I could see me
everyday.
Then I drew my village
placed my people in it
picked a house and lived in it
my story is me.
Then my story needed joy
and I drew all that too
I needed a boy
and I drew him too
but he broke and fell off
but first he broke me in two.
My story flows in and around through and above
my story.
Most times - there are dark forests-
but I don't want to be red riding hood
but I still met all my wolves
on watery full moons.
Then the pencil broke and my canvas flew away.
Now the Artist has taken over
and my story colours are bolder...
Layers
They seem stuck
hard to get off
but I must...
Shame hides me
tried to make me a ghost
durian strong
it lingers.
I peel back it's claws
watch it disappear.
Doubt burns -
burnt flesh nauseate
it reaches out to embrace...
I turn away
and let it slip down the drain.
Envy feeds on the bones of love -
bitter and venomous
life withers in its path
Even so
it tries to seduce
it must go
so,
I flung it over the cliff.
Fear digs deep...
drawing blood...
releasing Ethyl Mercaptan...
I almost pass out
but I removed it -
it slithered and slid away
screaming vengeance.
Now I am naked.
Ready
Rebirth.
Hic!
Hic!
Hic! -
Blast it man -
Hic!
everytime -
Hic!
Tired -
Hic!
All day
everyday
along the way
stretching into forever...
Burrp!
Burrp!
A whiff of a swoosh and swoosh!
Uncomfortable as heck!
but what relieve!
Right under the heart
what release,
sweet release.
Then quiet calm...
Imprisoned
Slowly the walls close
deja vu -
again
not again
once more
no door
trapped.
The defeaning sound of your heart
beats you into submission.
escape
where is it?
why won't it come
when you call?
Imprisoned
crafted by you
not knowing what to do
you look for a route
an escape...
A Series of Unfortunate Events?
Yes! To freedom I shimmy I glide, plier etendre releve sauter tourney elancer just watch me stride. A puddle in my way? oh no, nothing to stop my shine. Too fast! But the beat... Too high! But the breeze... I squeal! I reach! Pure delight. Midway I freeze... Oh no! my steam! That Je ne sais quoi... Gone. now, how, do I dance with me?
The Sublime
The Sublime In this moment I have found perfection. Rays of golden dust illuminate a path towards rest. I take a deep deep breathe And I know I am alive. From this chaos I snatch the beauty from a maggot infested world And I know I am alive. In this moment nothing matters. I leave the giant behind With no hair to let down I step down from my tower. I shake off the rusted chains Free to roam Free to find a home Finally. I am alive.
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