Tag: All about success

Finish strong and you’ll always win

Kevonstage



Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it.


1 Corinthians 9:24

Starting is easy when you finally decide to. However, where it really gets interesting is when Mohammed must decide whether or not he wants to meet the mountain! Of course I take this from the age old adage, “if the mountain will not come to Mohammed then Mohammed must go to the mountain”. What this is really saying is that if your will does not prevail as the ultimate choice then you must submit to an alternative. Let’s unpackage this.

We want to move on. We can see just ahead the new path we must take and we want to take it. But, before we can start on that new path, we need to finish this course. We are almost there, it’s almost finished – but not quite yet. For the impatient ones among us we begin to burn our bridge before we have finished crossing and risk falling to our demise – unintentionally of course. Many of us do not realise that it is the last 20% of work that requires 80% of our total effort to make the whole enterprise complete.

Many will start fast, few will finish strong

Gary Ryan Blair

I recently reminded my students that they will have to consider that many of the persons who they will leave school with when they graduate, will not be around them forever. They will leave together, but they will not stay together. It takes time to really understand what this means but after this discussion I did hear some of them reflecting on this truth that many find incomprehensible now. The friends you can’t go a day without talking to now, one day you will go days, then months, then years without seeing or talking to. As you run your race and you look to the left or the right, you begin to realise that some have dropped way behind or have opted out of the race completely. What will you do? Will you wait for them to catch up or will you join them on the sidelines. Also, consider that when many have left us we still have our race to complete, when we fail to maintain the pace others set for us we still have to finish the race the best we can. There is nothing that is guaranteed in this life; you won’t be the same forever, you won’t live in the same place, or be around the same people, love the same things and the list goes on. What is clear is that we all have a purpose and if we want to see it through then we have to ensure that when all else fails, our will and drive to finish our race is never compromised.

Is the Mountain Friend or foe?

We started at the mountain and there we shall end. The mountain can be viewed either as positive or negative. Moving forward, always look at the mountain as your springboard to success. A mountain can be the thing that tests and sharpen a spirit of survival; a testimony of your spiritual and mental growth and maturity. When you begin a race you don’t know the rest stops you will have to make but the mountain is always in sight and to meet it and experience it is to be at your optimum. It is where you will find your perfect self from your imperfect experiences.

Good! When you are behind schedule no one will see you coming and when they do, you can say [LOOK AT ME NOW!!!] Your light will shine bright enough to pave the way for others

It’s okay. We all wont get going at the same time. There are many who feel they have been left behind. We are the late bloomers! We need to tell ourselves, it’s okay not to be in line with the achievements of your peers and close friends.

Being a late bloomer may make persons feel bitter and harbor a lot of resentment because of the limiting position they think they are in. While your friend is a brain surgeon at 13 or could drive at 6, you are there trying to figure out how not to injure yourself from your own cluelessness!

Yep you’ve got it; success is sweetest when achieved early. Or so society makes it seem.While everyone is busy collecting those points, you wonder,”what’s the rush?’ Of course this is because you a absolutely clueless!

Maybe you don’t need to be “on schedule”.

But who decides if you are truly behind? If you are looking at what everyone has achieved or have accumulated then you are looking at the wrong clock!There is no time limit on when you can discover what makes you happy and what your passion is in life. It is also true that you don’t have to remain in something you are not happy with because it’s too late.

It’s never late.

If there is something that you have always wanted to do but felt intimidated by the sheer enormity of the task ahead, don’t be.I realize that being late to the party can be a humbling experience. There will be more appreciation for what you have accomplished because of the time it took to accomplish it in. You learn to realize that the world does not need to revolve around you but that you should make meaningful contributions that benefit those around you.

When it rains it pours!

When you do start blooming your beauty will be there to inspire others.So when you time comes make sure to make the most of it and spread your petals as far as you like!

Are you doing things for the right reason? I was speaking to a colleague today and the conversation led me to ask myself this question. Sometimes it is really hard to be honest with ourselves. We can give it but we can’t take it!

When you do something, are you doing it for the right reason? When you say something, are you saying it for the right reason? If you could weigh everything you say and do, would you be doing them for the right reasons? Would you be coming from a place that is real?

Many of us do and say things that we do not believe; we reside in places that we are uncomfortable in. However, we do them,say them and live there because we feel it is what is expected, what is required to be accepted by the group you want to be a part of.

It’s hard to know if we really are doing what we are capable of doing or just bluffing our way through life. There are too many of us who are happy with letting the wind blow where it may in our lives and then cry and complain because things are not going our way.

Yes as human beings we can be very contrary at times.We want to do and be but we never really do anything to get there.

Be honest with yourself.

So we come back to the questions. When we getup each day and live out that day, are we satisfied with what we have done and where we are at? Do we do things because we want to? If not, then we are not being real to ourselves or the people around us.If we take that promotion because we want to be validated but we are not really about that life, then it’s not for us. Do not base your decision on gaining recognition and fame only but because it is what really matters.

If you are afraid but confident (even if others discourage you) and you have a gut feeling, go with it, it’s usually right. Sometimes we know that what we are doing is wrong and where we are is not where we should be, but we do not pay attention to those feelings because we are afraid what others will think of our decision.

Don’t Doubt Yourself!

You know what is right for you; no one else can. You know what it will take to make you happy and content. chasing after what everyone else is chasing will not do it. Getting advise is good , especially from people who are successful in the area you want advise in. However, after getting it you then need to decide how you will use it. Remember everyone is different and you cannot expect to get the same result as someone else. Be willing to embrace your intuition and do what feels right for you and no one else, not even for someone who is the closest to you. Do not live on anyone else’s terms but your own; because, no one can live your life for you. When you feel confused or you are unsure of how to move forward ask yourself if you are making a decision for the right reason.

Are you being real to yourself?

“Don’t look back, girl,” … “You’re not going that way!” 

Celia Mcmahon, Skye: Part 1

“Ten years ago, I had so much going for me and now I have nothing; there is nothing that I currently enjoy doing, not work, going out, nothing. I wish I could go back ten years ago”.

I am pretty sure that EVERYONE can relate to having said something similar at least once in their lives. at some point we have felt a deep desire to return to a past experience or lifestyle, that makes our current situation seem like hell.

However, when we spend too much time looking behind us, precious time is lost for us to live in the present. While others are making plans for the future or learning from past mistakes, you are there busy looking at ruins too late to reconstruct or experiences no longer relevant to the present.

I am not suggesting that it may not be important to look back at a past mistake and learn from it but there is a danger when you are stuck in the past glories of your life. When you can hardly ever say, “I am going to…” but mostly “I was…” or “I did….” When the glory days become all you have to look forward to, then there is no room for creating or experiencing something new, and looking back becomes dangerous.

Can we look back?

One of the most important times to look back is when we need to see how far we have come and how much we have accomplished.Sometimes we do not realize that we are not exactly where we started. it may be hard to properly determine our progress, when we expect so much of ourselves and from life in general. When our minds start playing tricks on us, and we cannot see that we are advancing, because it seems to be taking forever! We need to look back in order to motivate ourselves that we will eventually reach the finish line and cross it. This act of looking back is necessary for our evolution as a person.

We can also learn from past mistakes and not repeat them. This too can be so difficult. We realize that we do not want to make the same mistakes but sometimes we do! The challenge is to look back at the point at which we went wrong and change our reaction or action. The point here is that it can be very necessary to look back at what we have done so that we don’t end up going in circles.

“The only reason time seems to be moving rather fast is that sometimes we’re too busy living in the past.”

― Dominic Riccitello

Living in the Past

“I recently bought a pair of shoes that did not fit properly! I tried it and knew it would not be comfortable but still I took it! Based on the exclamation marks you must realize my frustration at this point.I took the shoes because the size was the size I had always been; so it was the size on the shoe versus how it fit.”

When we live in the past we can never find the right fit in the now.

Depending on who you are there can be a sense of comfort and familiarity in living in the past. You don’t have any nasty surprises because you know what to expect. Your life can become a re-run of your favorite show and no one would be harmed by your doing so. However, there is a big loser and it is you. When you choose to live in the past, you also cannot stand in your present or step forward into your future. Sometimes we get so caught up in thinking how better yesterday was, that we cannot change today in order to have a tomorrow. We fail to appreciate the experiences we have in the now, until we look back at them and wish we had stayed there and be present, just a little longer. We may realize too late that once the present is gone it is gone and thinking about yesterday will not make our today any better. By living in the past we can become trapped there while life and everyone in it passes us by.

If we want to have healthy relationships today, then we have to be present ; we need to place our loved ones at the forefront of our thoughts and not have them as an afterthought- a backdrop easily replaced or forgotten. We need to step out of the past and leave it where it is, so we can stand firmly in our now.

What the superior man seeks is in himself; what the small man seeks is in others.

― Confucius

What does validation mean to you? We begin to address the first question by asking another question. I am a genius right? but hear me out. To validate someone or something can mean to prove or confirm that they are valuable or worthwhile.In other words we have a sense of worth by getting praise or recognition.

Validation on its own can be a wonderful experience, a necessary act. In validating someone we are acknowledging their unique qualities. We are saying, “yes I see you and I know that you are special and I respect you”. We all seek validation in all areas of our lives, whether or not we want to admit this.It’s difficult to measure if this is always good or bad. Certainly, there is a sense of pride when our efforts are recognized and we are able to see how pleased others are with our work. I suppose that is why there are so many award shows and ceremony nowadays. Everyone wants to get a gold medal, a statue, plague or even a certificate, that piece of paper that validate their efforts. No one wants to encounter the dreaded realm of non-recognition.

If you are waiting on someone, don’t!

Don’t worry about getting credit, do the work anyway.” 

― Richie Norton

Don’t wait on someone to validate you and your abilities. Validation becomes something bad when we base our worth and purpose in this life on what others say or think about us.When all that we are is the title we have been assigned by someone else and not the work we have yet to do. When we plan our lives based on what others will say and do.In order to be truly happy you need to do what feels right to you and what is right for you. When you need to stop, think and change your outlook, is when you cannot act without seeking or receiving validation from others.

Where does validation begin?..

Validation begins with self-validation. You must recognize your own good qualities and belief in them before others can. You must first praise yourself for your accomplishment and not wait on others to do so for you.When you do this then it won’t be whiplash when others do so.In validating yourself you recognize your worth and accept it. You also don’t need a medal, an award or a certificate to know your worth.The praise you receive from others should not be able to make or break your world but the “icing on the cake”!

In order to feel supported loved and valued we first need to give that to ourselves.But also we should remember that validation is not a one way thing. While we seek to validate ourselves and while we value the validation of others, let us remember to validate others. To focus on receiving praise and never consider giving is when we enter the domain of selfishness. Remember, validation is a good thing, just consider the reason you are seeking it.