When Health is Absent…

Our health is important. We see this message all the time in different ways. We try to eat right -sometimes – we may try to exercise – once in a while – but it may not be enough. Our health is about our mental, physical and spiritual wellbeing, but sometimes one or all of these suffer in our quest to succeed – whatever that looks like.

For many persons the pursuit of happiness is closely tied with the pursuit of wealth. “To be happy is to be financially secure”, this is how many of us feel and is what motivates us to keep striving and keep hustling. However, for many of us the proverbs also rings true, health is not valued till sickness comes. For some reason, I cannot clearly say, I have been more aware during the period of this pandemic how fragile we as humans truly are. It seems that not a week goes by when someone I know or know of has not died. That someone I love is not ill and I start to wonder why is death so present, staring us down. But death has always been there, it’s just that in the course of our lives many of us have been good at ignoring it until we reach that point where we have to face it in different ways, until it is our time.

We are distracted by the need to work hard to earn the things we are told we need to be successful, that some willingly trade their health to pursue a dream that has been foisted on them from birth. Scrolling through different social medias I see threads of conversations about investing in crypto currency and the importance of investments overall, and while all of that is something to consider I don’t really see the promotion of good health. It seems that health is something that many people ignore until later in order to make or get the “bag” now. Think about what the ancient Greek physician Herophilos pointed our, When health is absent, wisdom cannot reveal itself, art cannot manifest, strength cannot fight, wealth becomes useless and joy cannot be felt. Our health, is paramount to truly being successful,. There have been many times when I have been too sick to think straight and get simple tasks done and those moments remind me of how fragile I am, how little power I have, if my health is poor. I have learned the hard way that my health should be my number one priority, not being the next billionaire or living in financial comfort, gaining that promotion or the adulation of others. You see, it doesn’t matter how much wealth you have if you do not have the health needed to appreciate that wealth . You’re still gonna die leaving it behind.

Now, as morbid as that may sound to some people, the truth remains that, the truth, unchangeable and inescapable. I said that our health should be our number one priority but of course because we are living in this world and we need money to live in it, pursuing financial security must also be a priority. However, we should never sacrifice our health to get a buck, then what is the point. Some of us think that we are being responsible by staying in relationships that will ultimately be beneficial to us in the long run, but they are slowly helping to undermine our health. We think we are being mature by staying in situations that are terrible, because it shows how responsible we are, but we suffer in all ways because of that choice. We not only have a duty to take care of our body, but also our mind and spirit. So when we find ourselves in situations that threaten any or all, we must work at removing them from our lives or removing ourselves from them. The gains you are advised about getting is not worth compromising any of those key things to your health. Also, we must recognize and acknowledge the traumas that still affect our lives and address them. We do not do so by undermining the potential of others by expecting them to fix them or fix us, but by being honest and getting the help that will be fair to those close to us and to our own needs. It is important that we remember: before healing others, heal yourself

I do not have the answers nor the life experiences to give the best advice that persons may need. I too struggle with my health and with the need to be financially secure. I struggle with finding a balance between giving enough and not too much of myself. However, we must put our health and wellbeing first, sometimes even above those we love and are closest to. We must take the time to see what is or is likely to undermine our health and work at improving them: when the heart is at ease the body is healthy. This I fear is not a year long endeavor, but a lifetime of trial and error. We have to create a balance where our financial situation does not lead to ill health and not allowing our pursuit of financial gain to overshadow our commitment to good health. Further, we cannot allow relationships or situations to be the catalyst of chronic ill-health either.

There are no smooth roads or easy journeys to finding a balance in life that will lead to good health. However, the choices that we make now, will determine our quality of health down the road. Whether making the right choices or the wrong ones, in the end we will reap the consequences.

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The Inconvenience of Convenience

It’s easy to sit back and let others take charge. You may not be the type who likes to appear aggressive or forward. You are not the type to thrive by being uncomfortable. Or, simply when someone else does the things you find unpleasant it makes your life easier. However, there are many dangers lurking just around the corner, when you get too laid back. Many dangers when you decide to allow others to make decisions about what you eat, what you wear, who you like or don’t like, what you do, and what you think. We think our lives are easy because everything is at our finger tips, but we do not know that we have to pay a price for it and sometimes that price is the loss of our voice and the stunting of our potentials.

Convenience can be the a gilded cage for many of us, who like the bird, must live with permanently clipped wings never knowing the joys of soaring high. We are fed information on a need to know basis and while we think we are living meaningful lives we do not realize that things have been constructed in such a way that we do not come to the truth of how little we truly experience life. Consider someone who does not have to worry about how to sustain themselves, cook, wash, clean, pay bills, or make any hard decisions about their lives. They seem to just have everything handed to them, they glide through live. However, that person is imprisoned by his ignorance of what life is about and if they are removed from their cage they cannot thrive. Others decide for them and determine what happiness should be, what the truth is and how much they can test the limits of their strength. Of course many make this choice because they think t is easy, better and safer. But as many of us know easier does not always mean better.

Consider convenience food. We all love them because they are so easy, in no time at all, presto! We have food! However, they come with their own set of problems. They have consequences for our health both young and old. They can lead to developmental issues for children, and lead to diseases such as diabetes, but we love them and we are encouraged to consume them, and we do not knowing the full story of their impact later in life. So, it is easy to be led, to be told and be inspired because it is all convenient but we lose the art of being free thinking and being creative, to make new discoveries and experience different ways of being and experiencing life. We think we are excited about things but we may not be because everything has been pre-packaged and shipped to us for our convenience. The pandemic has made it even harder for us to explore beyond what we are fed on social media. We spend so much time consuming truths that have been prepared to engage us, we depend on them to make us happy, laugh and find meaning in life and rely less on out tenacity and natural zest for live. We forget the steps we would have taken beyond those monitors that would enable us have experiences and not just view them though a glass pane. There is no longer the thrill of realizing that our efforts can yield pleasant surprises because we have forgotten what it feels like to enjoy the journey, of realizing that inconveniences hold many precious life gems that can enrich our lives. Instead we are bombarded with microwavable experiences filled with bland and unappetizing mush that has been mass produced for our enjoyment. And we are told that is what we like, and so we consume it with enthusiastic chagrin.

As a teacher of literature I see the harm of convenience in the attitudes of my students, who do not want to take the time to enjoy the experience that a novel can give. Instead, they want to pass the exam, but they do not want to engage with the work. So, they find all the summaries and videos they can and miss many live lessons and insights on human nature. They miss the opportunity to have their humanity challenged and if compromised, restored. Many persons, just like my students, say they do not have the time nor the patience to try, the courage to face challenges nor to explore beyond their predetermined ideas of what people are and what the world is like. We don’t want to struggle, we don’t want to fail, so we bury our heads in the sand, accept that this is all we know and become slaves to conveniences, a life created for us with much of our input.

Maybe it is that some do not want to enjoy the journey but the destination. Maybe it is that persons’ lives have been enriched by the modern conveniences available to many today. And yes, it is true that not all persons can and do have access to all those modern conveniences. But, where we may realize that we have become dependent on conveniences not vital to living, there is nothing wrong in questioning or being alert to how we can be lulled into inactivity by the pull of convenience.

Stop Searching…

It seems there is always another mountain to conquer for so many people. When you are young you have to chase that dream, that elusive success or thing that will get you in. Some people spend their whole life chasing after things that they never should have chased in the first place. “They just maybe a better way, a better job, a better person, waiting for me somewhere” or so too many tell themselves. They never stop and appreciate all that they already have. Instead they continue to chase those things until they get to the cliff’s edge and in their desperation leap and fall.

From such a fall there is no redemption, no way to rewind and do things over. Instead they must accept their fate and either fight the inevitable or give in. So, before we get to the edge we need to step back, stop and think. “Have been chasing pavements all this time? This is what we need to know, what we need to decide. There are many no longer here with us who never had the chance to have this moment. Now they are gone. But we are still here and in a quiet moment of all the world’s noise, we need to decide to stop searching for things. To stop searching for wealth, health and happiness. To know that we an create happiness right where we are, right now. Stop chasing after the perfect time, because each time we reach for it it steps a little past our finger tips – and we only grab air…

Oh what we find,
 when we stop searching.
 Oh what we find, 
when we stop forcing.
 Oh what we receive, 
when we stop fearing. 
Oh what we become,
 when we just love. 
                      Creig Crippen

Pretty Lies, Ugly Truths, You Choose.

We all care about he aesthetics of things. Though we are often told that “beauty is in the eyes of the beholder”, we all like to be surrounded by things we and society deem beautiful, even lies. In many instances we have allowed ourselves to be led, to see false narratives as the truth, untainted, because it pleases “me” to do so. We are quick to see beauty in things that have been made to look so, an optical illusion that hides many many ugly truths. The truth is too real and too painful for too many and so many are willing to cover it, stifle it or kill it in order to live lives of lies. We accept the unspoken rule that some things should never be spoken because they are unpleasant and too many turn away from the ugliness right in front of us to stare at mirages that spring from our imagination.

Lies become beautiful, seemingly harmless nuggets that attract the sensibilities and lull us into a false and piteous sense of security. You see lies hold prominence because so many want to be convinced of them, they want to hold tight to them and so they are whispered time and time again until they are in grained in many psyches. However, they are fools gold that rust easily when correctly challenged but many of us are not brave enough to look the ugly truth in the eyes – many of us would not survive such exposure. This of course does not stop many from flirting with those lies, because they are so tempting, many reflecting and aligning with many of our desires.

So, on one tables lies a buffet of tempestuous lies, disguised as very tempting morsels that will delight the palette and beside this are only the bitter pills of truth that may hurt and cause acid reflux; Which will you choose. Whether we spread them or we believe them sometimes lies are hard to reject because they have become the basis for how we exist in this world. Each day, each lie that we accept makes it less likely for us to understand how far we have sung in a web we may have helped weave to trap ourselves in. But, we must be willing to finally break free from that web, to be honest enough to see things for what they are and not what we always wished them to be. “The truth will set us free” they say. There is nothing more freeing than not living within the bounds of pretentious smiles and fake interests. From returning the cult membership of being on trend with the lies we tell ourselves because we want to fit in somehow.

Now, what will you choose? Will you choose to embrace those pretty lies that may lead to more complications down the road – but not right now of course – or, truths that paint a realistic picture with all the gore and grime that lies never truly erase, but instead covers for consumption later, much later? Each day we have a choice to make, to go along to get along or be the truthsayer and disrupt those false narratives.

Walking that Treadmill…

Walking on a treadmill versus walking is a big difference. When you walk on a treadmill you walk aimless because you are walking in the same place. Many of us want to change, we want to grow and have new experiences but we are walking on treadmills. We think the same way we have always thought, do the same things we have always done, go the same places we have always gone, we become slaves to habits that have never served us and wonder why we are stuck. We want to shake off 2020 and all that did not go right but, we still are thinking about all that went wrong last year and have not committed to looking ahead. We are stuck. Escape is necessary but hard.

There are many who also think they are getting ahead but have not looked down to see that they are moving at a predetermined pace on a predetermined device. All that they have accumulated to themselves have bogged them down to remain in place. We may think we are in control but how many times do we feel out of control when we are overwhelmed by all that we are required to do. We certainly do not require it of ourselves, but some how, in order to pass the test we remain committed to a cause not our own. A cause that we can never explain without being more confused than we were a few minutes before we started our explanation.

And do not think for minute it is easy to get off. With many doubts about getting off, many choose to ride or walk it out until they can stop. However, a crazy though is to get off while you can even if it means risking all and grabbing back only the pieces of yourself. It will be worth it trust me.

The Cost of Loss

The Cost of Loss

The cost of loss 
each time
is a little pound of flesh
messy yes
but cannot be helped
because it is a price paid forward.
Each tear you shed
a shred of glass
that makes a trench 
for the blood you sweat.
With each small departure
a little more of you goes.
They say it be better to have loved and lost
but what price must you pay.
If that love should go
you are bound to lose your way.
And if you face constant loss 
what is the better then?
pretty words are easy to write
until you are challenged by them.
Should I build myself an island
and build a fortress for my heart?
Should I abandon all hope
to catch the love dart?
If I fortify myself good enough
can I save myself from harm
from loss?
When I think of how it eats at me
how each one grieves me
I cannot catch a breath.
Yet there I go 
letting down my defenses
So loss can breach my walls.

Broken Mirror

Broken mirror 
shattered soul
splintered into the four dimensions.
Some lost
never to return
pieces buried too deep.
corrupted soul
cursed to suffer
for seven years times eternity
cursed to never be whole again.
should it be dust
or buried by a tree
or left to flow down South.
But
Broken mirror
Do
become many mirror too.
Each containing a piece of you
you can return to.
Look at each and try to place
the missing pieces back together again.
Look closely and grab the light 
reflected towards you
a different light
that leads you to look at things
 differently.
Broken mirror
tells a story 
of how you transformed
despite the odds
to become a unique you.