Why Does Everyone Want to be Successful?

Most of the time, we see only what we want to see, or what others tell us to see, instead of really investigate to see what is really there. We embrace illusions only because we are presented with the illusion that they are embraced by the majority. When in truth, they only become popular because they are pounded at us by the media with such an intensity and high level of repetition that its mere force disguises lies and truths. And like obedient schoolchildren, we do not question their validity and swallow everything up like medicine. Why? Because since the earliest days of our youth, we have been conditioned to accept that the direction of the herd, and authority anywhere — is always right.

― Suzy Kassem, Rise Up and Salute the Sun: The Writings of Suzy Kassem

The quote above really got my attention and so, while it is lengthy I put it here for us to consider why we want to succeed. The question came to me from nowhere it seems. Why do you want to succeed? what is your ulterior motive. What is the intrinsic value of our need to be successful in life.

Many persons never stop to ask themselves these questions. We want that promotion, we want the recognition, we want that degree, we want and want and need that thing that will say to others that we are achievers and overachievers. But we never stop to question the authenticity of the wantings. So, if we want a certain type of success, is it because it is a part of our plan or did we see the awards and recognitions being collected by someone and decide that that is what we should be aiming for. Like a careless driver who makes u-turn in a no u-turn area, do we spin around, likely endangering the lives of others, to chase someone else’s dream?

And there are some who want success because they feel future successes will wipe out past failures. So it is not that we necessarily believe in the things we want, but we believe they will vindicate a guilty conscience and make it easier for us to look in the mirror. However, what we may need to do before we move on to embracing the success we desire is to appreciate the role that those failures had in our impending success. Instead of being afraid to fail we should embrace failure as a means to success. If you do not fall how will you get up? We should always know and believe that even in the midst of our success failure is waiting in the wings to enter stage right once more.

Another thought provoking response to this question is this:

Achievement typically measures an externally imposed standard. Accomplishment typically describes an internally motivated goal.

when we talk and think success, is it achievement or accomplishment based? If it is to achieve then the goal post for your success will always be measured by an external entity and you may spend your whole life, spent trying to reach an unachievable goal set you. You may find yourself about to achieve that thing you spent so much time on, when suddenly you are told you have to do one more little thing and then that becomes another, eventually with no end in sight. First you need to know that if you do not have the talent to sing well you can’t be a successful singer ( unless you have the money and or right connections, then who knows!). But know your strengths, your weaknesses, what you will be willing to fight to get simply because it matters to you and maybe no on else. Then you can say, I have accomplished what I need to accomplish and will reap the right rewards. Accomplishing comes before achieving.

There is nothing wrong with success but we need to check ourselves when we fervently chase it. Do we do so because it really matters to us or is it, just because?

Invictus

As we work hard to get to our goals, let us remember; in life we do not get what we deserve but we almost always get what we expect. Also in every situation, our perception drives our reality. Let fearless faith drive our actions and not terrifying fear.

Invictus 
 
Out of the night that covers me, 

      Black as the pit from pole to pole, 

I thank whatever gods may be 

      For my unconquerable soul. 



In the fell clutch of circumstance 

      I have not winced nor cried aloud. 

Under the bludgeonings of chance 

      My head is bloody, but unbowed. 



Beyond this place of wrath and tears 

      Looms but the Horror of the shade, 

And yet the menace of the years 

      Finds and shall find me unafraid. 



It matters not how strait the gate, 

      How charged with punishments the scroll, 

I am the master of my fate, 

      I am the captain of my soul. 

WILLIAM ERNEST HENLEY

Off the Beaten Path

Today I want to take you somewhere you have not been with me before. As you may or may not know, I like to use quotes that keep me motivated. Today I share some Jamaican proverbs that while entertaining to decipher, offer valuable nuggets of wisdom.

So here you are, some Jamaican proverbs to inspire you and keep you going!

All these proverbs, translations and explanations, were taken from the National Library of Jamaica website. Please click on the link to see what else they have to offer…

Proverb: If you get your han’ in a debil mout’ tek it out.

Translation: If you put your hand in the devil’s mouth, take it out carefully.
Explanation: Act cautiously in getting out of difficulty.

Proverb: Ebry dyay debble help teef; wan dyah Gad wi help watchman.

Translation: Every day the devil helps the thief; one day God will help the watchman.
Explanation: We should not despair when it appears to us that unscrupulous persons continue to take advantage of us with no apparent deterrent. God never sleeps, and is fully aware of everything that occurs.  He will one day reward the efforts of the faithful.

Proverb: Big blanket mek man sleep late

Translation: A thick blanket  causes a man to sleep late.
Explanation: An over-abundance of luxuries causes one to become complacent, and to take life’s blessings for granted.

Proverb: No matta how kokkuch junk, im noh waak pass fowl yaad

Translation: No matter how drunk the cockroach becomes, he never makes the mistake of walking past the yard of the fowl.
Explanation: The cockroach is considered to be a delicacy for fowls.  In the interest of self-preservation, cockroach is reluctant to go past any area where he may be easily caught by a fowl.  For humans, he same should apply, self-preservation being the first law of the of the species.

Proverb: Hag nyam wha im myne gi im fah

Translation: The hog/pig eats whatever its mind gives it for [or wants].
Explanation: To each, his own.

Proverb: No mug no bruk, no cawfee no dash weh

Translation: The mug is not broken, therefore the coffee is not thrown away (or wasted).
Explanation: Even in the most difficult of times, if total devastation has not occurred, one should count his/her blessings.  Do not blow simple matters out of proportion.

Proverb: A no ebryting kum fram abuv a blessen

Translation: Not everything that comes from above is a blessing.
Explanation: Enjoy those blessings which come from above, but do not be misled by deceivers who use their superior positions to dispossess the unfortunate.

Proverb: Yu cyaan ketch Quaku (Harry), yu ketch im shut

Translation: If you cannot catch Quaku (Harry), catch his shirt
Explanation: It is not always possible to get everything you want.  Be satisfied with what little you have, until you are able to get all you want.  Having caught Quako’s shirt, you are all the closer to catching him.

Those were just a few for you to enjoy, hope you found at least one that you can relate to and use. Until next time…

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Words To Keep You Going….

Have you ever felt as if you just could not go a another step? When this happens sometimes we need to remind ourselves to keep going. Here are some quotations you can use this week to help you set the pace and keep you ahead of your doubts:

Let’s face it, life is tough! We are either entering, enduring or exiting a battle!

Nicola McFadden, Rebound Faith: CHAYAH!

There is no secret to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work and learning from failure.

General Colin Powell

You’ve got to get up every morning with determination if you’re going to go to bed with satisfaction.

George Lorimer

You’re time is limited so don’t waste it living someone else’s life

Steve Jobs

When you get to the end of the rope, tie a knot and hang on

Franklin D Roosevelt

To begin is hard but to finish strong is even harder

Simone Grant

Sometimes the bad things that happen in our lives put us directly on the path to the most wonderful things that will happen to us.

Nicole Reed, Ruining You

Don’t be afraid of losing people. Be afraid of losing yourself by trying to please everyone around you.

Live Life Happy

Patience is when you are suppose to be mad but you choose to understand

Via The Minds Journal

I never judge people on their first appearance, because sometimes people who seem sweet can be the biggest snakes and the people who look arrogant ad rude can be the nicest people ever when you actually get to know them

Unknown

Train your mind to stay calm in every situation

Unknown

When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile.

Unknown

We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope

Martin Luther King Junior

If you haven’t confidence in self, you are twice defeated in the race of life

Marcus Garvey

As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn’t leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I’d still be in prison

Nelson Mandela

Stop Being your Worst Enemy!

We’re our own worst enemy. You doubt yourself more than anybody else ever will. If you can get past that, you can be successful

It is now June and we have said adios to May. We are halfway through the year and in that time we have experienced a lot. Have you accomplished all you set to accomplish within that time or are you like many, still waiting to begin? If you fall in the former and have done what you have to do, congratulations; continue on this path. It’s good to stop and congratulate yourself when you stick to your goals, especially as life throws a lot of curb balls our way. You have recognised your power and have tapped into the source of it. For those who are struggling, it’s not too late to tap into your source and realise all that you want to accomplish by the end of the year. But we must ask ourselves a very important question. Have we become our worst enemies?

How we become our enemy

If you continue to make excuses as to why you cannot do what you have to do in order to get ahead, then you have become your worst enemy. Also, if you still compare yourself to others and find your are lacking in every way imaginable, then sadly you are your worst enemy. This idea leads into the act of being critical, not of others, but of yourself. Have you said yes to things that you really wanted to say no to because you knew it was not for you? Then reconsider doing this, as you will continue to waste time on things that take you further away from your purpose. It maybe painful but sometimes it’s more productive to cut off the unnecessary trimmings that look pretty but hold no value.

Stop and Think

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Stop doing the same things that give you the same result- if you want something new, you won’t get ahead by going in circles. You may also need to hear the bitter truth, that not everyone in your circle mean you well; trust the voice within when you realise this and intentionally cut them off. Stop believing that we all have to march in a band. Instead take your drum and your drum stick and march to the beat of your own drum- you will feel a lot better when you appreciate what you have produced instead of what others have produced for you.It’s okay to trust in yourself because you have the same abilities as the people you put your trust in. After all we all have a unique rhythm. Now, I will pause here and say that I am not suggesting that it’s better to be alone. But it is important to know that there isn’t only one way to get things done. Instead, explore new opportunities and avenues.

Assumptions

Finally, stop making assumptions. Today I heard a fantastic tale of intrigue and suspense on the basis of an unknown woman’s sudden appearance; worse yet she was not dressed to be apart of the scene. As a result, the group I was a part of had judged her as having criminal intent. That tale was a lot more juicy than what was the reality. She was told by someone who ‘belonged’, to come to collect a package. Further, after meeting her we had no choice but to put to rest the wildly delicious tale and embrace the truth. So, stop making assumptions about people and situations when we do not have the full picture. We often get fact and fiction confused; the person who seems to mean us well may not and the one who does not, actually want the best for us. Don’t rely solely on our assumptions about anything or anyone. Most importantly do not assume that because you are not where you want to be, you will never get there. You may get there sooner than you think. It all depends on you.

Collecting the Pieces

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.Then you will call on me and pray to me, and I will listen to you. you will seek me and find me when you seek me with your heart.”

Jeremiah 29:11-13

She walked in the dark unsure of where to place her feet. She walked alone. The cold bit into her flesh and the icy cold sliced into her fragile skin. As she swayed from left to right, she recognised this could be the end. Just ahead she knew she would find the answer. She could neither see nor hear. She was lost. A million and one hands,voices and bodies pushed against her advance and threatened to pull her under. She stumbled, buckling under the pressure that she could not see and did not understand. Somehow she had just enough strength to drag herself along. Would she make it? Suddenly she saw a blinding light; she heard the horns just as it became too late. Was it too late?

What if we woke up everyday expecting the best and not the worst? Many persons are too afraid to think this way, because for them life has shown them that expecting the best all the time is a fantasy. And whether we like it or not, we live in the real world, with real problems. However, do we have to focus so heavily on all the things that could or have gone wrong? How have we contributed to our hopeless state? Many of us are unwilling to admit that we are complicit in our own situation. When we choose to focus on our problems and wallow in them we are not acknowledging that even in our difficulties God has a plan for us. We see opportunities to get out of bad situations and we are too afraid to take them, because everything else has failed so far. So we say, “why bother”. Like the girl above we do not get off the road we are on until we have a sense of direction. Instead we continue without a purpose and expect to get results.

The Small Pieces Matter

There will always be situations that threaten our happiness but we do not have to allow them to reek havoc in our lives. When you see the overcast skies, do you complain about the possible negative conditions it will bring or do you express gratitude at the experiences you will have because of the rain. Far too often we take the little things for granted. But think about the fact that those small, seemingly insignificant things end up creating the bigger picture. We don’t have to continue our aimlessly sojourn, but can find some measure of direction and insight in the word of God. What you need to do sometimes is to stop and think about what you want to seek out in your quest to live your purpose. Will you continue to walk down a dark road with a fear filled outcome or in confidence at the little blessings waiting around you to be collected and used for your good?

What’s the Truth?

Above all, don’t lie to yourself. The man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie comes to a point that he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, and so loses all respect for himself and for others. And having no respect he ceases to love

Fyodor Dostoevsky

What is Your Truth Anyway?

I have noticed that there is an emphasis in many societies concerning selfcare, self-awareness and self-love. However, when you or someone says, “live your truth”, do we really know what this means? One crucial component of living your truth many will say is to be yourself. Yes we can say be ourselves but many people do not know who they are . I am sure that there are some who are reading this who have to pause and consider. Who am I? Some of you may use the labels of wife, , father, manager, doctor ect that society has bestowed on you but that is not where I am trying to go here. When I say, my name is Simone, Who am I really saying I am? Leta Stevens, a wellness coach says, to live your truth, means following your heart. But what if what’s in your heart is unacceptable to many, how brave will you be to do it anyway? The point I’m trying to make here is that living your truth may not be as easy as saying it and doing it.

Truth is Stranger Than Fiction

Have you ever lied by telling the truth? confused? consider this then: someone is asked are you doing what you need to and the response, ” well I have started”. It could be they have, but what they have started may have nothing to do with what they need to do. Therefore, another thing that may be preventing us from living our truth is that we are dishonest. We wake up everyday, live our lives and lie to ourselves. We focus so much sometimes on being in the right, being recognised for doing what is good, but we do not acknowledge that half the things we do are to impress others. One of the things I heard recently is the notion that in giving we are selfish. We do good sometimes because at the end of it all we hope to gain recognition or an award. We hope to be validated and it is a battle for us to do and not expect a reward; even a thank you. We often are painted the picture that in living your truth, there will be a drastic change for the better. And we learn the hard way that taking that direction may bring many challenges and defeats; even betrayals from those closest to us ( 1 Peter 4:4 Of course, your former friends are surprised when you no longer plunge into the flood of wild and destructive things they do. So they slander you ). All that is drastic yes but initially or ever, do we see these as better than what was. We do not acknowledge that the world may see our truth as lies maybe because they are or because it does not align with the script on this worldly stage we were handed at birth. There are also many people we admire for having done wonderful things and gaining international recognition while living their truth. However, we may be surprised at how many minor fictitious roles having been buried beneath those polished images. Sometimes the truth for many is stranger than fiction (Lord Byron Don Juan 1823)and therefore while we feel we are operating in our truth, the truth is we may not be doing so. In order to live your truth you have to know your truth -not someone else’s – and embrace the good and the bad as being a part of you.

There is Freedom in the Truth

It’s so much easier to lie about the truth than it is to be honest. And let’s be honest, some people cannot handle the truth, no matter how much they tell you they can. It takes a lot of courage to live your truth because not all of who we are will be pleasing to others or even ourselves. We will constantly be faced with the need to revisit what our truth is because it will be challenged. The truth is that we will be uncertain many times about the direction we should follow, because we do not know. We may not know who we are and for the reminder of our lives we have to reaffirm this. But where is our source? I suggest that we try to be like that Samaritan woman at the well (St. John 4:5-42). Let us be truthful, open and honest about all aspects of who we are; the good, the bad and the ugly, but do not dwell in it. Take the opportunity given to you by God to be honest and grab your truth from the jaws of lives many defeats that have only slowed you down, but will never destroy you.

The only rule is that truth must empower you, make you better in every way possible

― Kamal Ravikant, Live Your Truth