Are You A Who or A What?

It’s not the honors and not the titles and not the power that is of ultimate importance. It’s what resides inside.

Fred Rogers

Are you at the bottom or the top? Are you “poor” or “rich”? “Hot” or “not”? Are you a who or a what?

Many people can only operate based on categories, popular assumptions or hashtags. In other words, titles and positions matter a great deal to many, but we never think about how dehumanizing they can be. We all know of at least one person who at one point was an easy going human, who got along with everyone and wasn’t a problem. Until they get that title. Then, that same mild mannered human vanishes as the title arrives; apparently to be practicing for a new transformers movie, they become monsters. Suddenly they are a thorn in EVERYONE’S side and no one wants to be around them. They appear to have little compassion and have totally ignored the fact that the last time we checked, the world does not revolve around them and what they want. They take it as their right to make unrealistic demands and ensure that they always put others in “their place”. After all they have a title to keep up. So, they gather their minions – poor things they don’t know they are disposable until they are disposed of – and they enact terrorist acts on any they deem deserving. They become something to be despised and ridiculed – when they are not around that is.

But they forget that that title, position and power are transient, lasting until someone else comes along or they are no longer useful in the grand scheme of things. Some forget that a title is not a birthright and even if it is, its value can diminish, like anything else. It’s sad to know that some people place more importance in the titles they acquire than in the lives they encounter. It’s both sad and ironic though, because their position is a precarious one; easier to topple the higher they go. For persons who want to be leaders, do they consider that it’s about the contribution you make and not the fact that you have achieved a title. When we interact with others in the capacity of a title, that person should feel inspired not frustrated and demotivated. Being human to all not just those you think are valuable to you, is what you need to take with you when you get that title. In others words, your title should not define you but you must define the title that you have. Enter with your humanity and do not kick it off at the door. Who you are should not be contingent on the position you hold and what you want from others.

Having a title or titles is great, if that matters to you. But the title that you are given will not make you more desirable, more respected or more loved –not for real for real. How you treat others and the legacy you leave is what determines who you are. Any title you get says more about what you are but underneath the mask of that title is who you are. And that is what people will remember. After all, what is the title without the person to assume it?